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  • Writer's pictureLisa Terrenzi


What makes people great? Why do we remember some people long after they are gone and forgot some that are still near us? The truth is, that we gravitate toward those that make us feel good. We want to feel happy and have feel-good experiences in life.

Growing up, I noticed the entire family would tend to flock over to certain relatives as soon as they entered the room. What made them different? One thing the “popular” relatives and friends had in common is they really cared for others and that caring shone through like floodlights in a Hollywood movie premiere!

Caring about others gives one a sense of purpose and something to focus on. Further, it can prevent one from dwelling on unimportant issues or drama. Caring means a feeling of being concerned for someone and having an urge to show kindness to them.

“The simple act of caring is heroic,” as Edward Albert said.

“For it is in giving that we receive” — Saint Francis of Assisi

“The sole meaning of life is to serve humanity” — Leo Tolstoy

“We make a living by what we get; we make a life by what we give” — Winston Churchill

“Giving back is as good for you as it is for those you are helping, because giving gives you purpose. When you have a purpose-driven life, you’re a happier person” — Goldie Hawn

Want to be a person that everyone really loves and wants to be around? Here are a few things you can start doing right now to help others and gain their admiration and friendship:

1. Show Genuine Interest In Their Life. Truly. Be interested in what’s going on with them. Learn about them, their work, hobbies, and passions. Pay attention to what they are enthusiastic about, talk to them about it, and see how you could be of help. It is not only the easiest way to connect with them but also the best way to make them feel you value and truly care about them.

2. Help Them Further Their Goals And Reach Their Full Potential. For most people, their life goals are their topmost priority. If you get an inkling that a loved one is experiencing trouble reaching their goals, don’t wait for them to ask you for assistance. Contribute in all possible ways that you can. Help them get over those things blocking them from achieving their goals and any perceived limits. Boost their confidence, motivate them to keep going, strive for more and be the best they can be.

3. Be There When They Need You. It is important to make people feel secure especially when they are upset, have faced failure, or experienced hardships in life. Be there for them, comfort them, reassure them and offer your unconditional support. It can make a big difference in their life and will give them the strength to bounce back from the setbacks.

4. Help Them Solve Their Problems And Resolve Issues. Everyone has their set of problems that hassle them daily. Spend time with your loved ones to get an insight into their problems and see how you can help make their life simpler and easier.

5. Don’t Judge Them. No one is perfect. Everyone has flaws, falters, or errs sometimes or the other. Avoid judging and criticizing them. Practice patience and tolerance; accept them the way they are. Also, see how you can help them improve and add value to their life. Look beyond their mistakes, appreciate their positives, raise their self-esteem, and make them feel good about themselves. This will go a long way in strengthening the bond and win over their confidence.

6. Celebrate Their Successes. Show them they matter. Acknowledge their hard work and persistence and congratulate them on their success and victories, even the small ones. Genuinely feel happy that they have made progress toward their vision.

7. Share Their Burden Of Responsibilities. Everyone has their hands full when it comes to working. But try to take time out and lend a helping hand. Assist family and friends with their stuff. Help them with a difficult task, run an errand or take care of some of the things they need to do. Showing your eagerness to share their burden of responsibility will demonstrate your genuine interest in them.

8. Pep Them Up When They Are Feeling Down. No matter how strong a person is, each one has their low times when feelings of sadness or despair sneak in. This is the time when you should be around and cheer them up. Distract them from those agonizing thoughts and help the shift their focus from negative to seeing positives in their life. Help them count their blessings.

9. Express Your Gratitude When They Do Something For You. It doesn’t cost anything to visit a loved one or a treasured friend and thank them for what they did for you. Expressing your gratitude and appreciating their support would speak volumes about you and convey to them that you acknowledge their help and feel grateful for all they have done for you on different occasions.

10. Encourage Them To Share Their Pain With You. When you see your loved ones overwhelmed by suffering or a personal loss, don’t ignore or adopt a silent approach. Talk to them, comfort them, encourage them to share their pain with you, and let them know you are there with them in their emotional crisis. Your comforting attitude and positive mindset will have a calming effect.

11. Provide A Listening Ear. Sometimes pent-up feelings can lead to stress, anxiety, fear, and a feeling of insecurity. To help your loved ones and show your concern, let them express themselves uninhibited.

Give them your undivided attention and hear them out. This will help you gain their perspective and let them know you understand their situation.

12. Let Them Know They Make You Feel Good. Everyone likes to know they mean something to someone. Take time out to communicate to your family and friends what they mean to you. Express your genuine appreciation by telling them that you enjoy their company, love spending time with them, and look forward to meeting them. This will make them feel loved and cherished.

13. Spend Time With Them When They Feel Lonely. If a loved one is going through a rough patch and feeling low, register your presence by being with them. Talk to them about old times, relive favorite memories, go out, or plan a fun activity together.

Do your part to help others and you will become a floodlight of happiness and security for others. Changing the world doesn’t mean you have to constantly do something extremely drastic. Changing the world can be as simple as shining your light in the direction of someone who needs it. That then has a ripple effect like no other.

You can make a difference.

Lisa Terrenzi

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